My Dream
I suddenly appeared at my Baker Reunion in Big Johns Flat on Beaver Mountain. All my family was there except my mom who died a few months earlier. When we got there we set our trailer up and we sat around the fire telling funny stories and memories about my mom. Everyone was still sad about our loss. I went for a little walk just around our campsite.
All of the sudden i saw a white limo drive up. I was confused for a minute. Then i saw the back door open in the limo and i saw my mom walk out! I had tears running down my face, I was so happy! I ran up to her and i gave her a hug as if i never wanted to let go! She was wearing all white as if she was an angel.
She came and sat by us and we talked for a short time until her phone rang. It wasn’t her usual phone, it was a white phone with white wings. When it her phone rang the wings would go up and down like they were flying. My mom answered the phone. After she had talked for about a minute she hung up and she said that she had to go.
All of the sudden i woke up from my dream laying in my bed. I still remember my moms voice and her laugh. When i woke i immediately went to my dad and i told him about my dream. He told me that it was my mom saying that she loved me and that she misses me. He also told me that she probably had to go visit another family member so thats why she had to leave. I don’t quite remember what we were talking about in my dream but i know that she loves me and i love her. I hope that one day i will have another dream like that one!
Oh Annie, I was so touched by your story--it made me cry. Great writing makes people feel--feel deeply and be moved. Being able to write your own emotions is powerful. My only suggestion would be too add more detail about what you could see and hear. Thank you for sharing. Well done.
ReplyDeleteAnnie that was a really touching story! For the short amount of time I was reading, I felt like I was in a different place. Maybe next time you could describe the objects a little more? Other than that your story was fantastic and you are a great writer!
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ReplyDeleteAnnie! That was so touching I loved it! I loved the feeling I got while I was reading this and how I could picture it in my head! Great job Annie! My only suggestion is to capitals the I's other than that it was great!!!
ReplyDeleteThat was really beautiful, Annie. I know it's really hard to describe dreams(they go so quickly) but it was really touching. I also think that it would be nice if you could describe a bit more, but it was perfect to me.
ReplyDeleteThat was so beautiful! It was a really touching story. My only suggestions are capitalize the I's and try to add more details, other than that great job!
ReplyDeleteIt was a very good story. It was a very enjoyable story. The way you expressed your emotions was very good. It was also very cool to see how you described your story. I honestly don't have that many suggestions. So keep it up!
ReplyDeleteThat was lovely. I liked the way you expressed your emotions. I loved every bit of it. Great job.
ReplyDeleteNice job I really like the story. I liked how you gave the reader a good image in there head. I really like how you described every detail that happened. I would not change anything in the story it is perfect. I wish I could write as good as you.
ReplyDeleteThanks guys! I will make sure to do those things on my next story!
ReplyDeleteI loved your story Annie. I would recommend capitalizing the I's and adding a bit more details. Other than that, it was very touching and sad in a beautiful way.
ReplyDeleteI loved your story! I liked the positivity at the end. Next time, you should add a little more character description. Great Work!!!!!!!!!
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