Short Story
I woke up this morning to the same exact thing I always do. The sun in my face and my annoying alarm going off, but wait. I saw something new that I have yet to notice these past years. As I looked up, I saw a hole that looked like it was just carved. It was oddly placed in the center of the boring white colored ceiling. I was very confused.”Hmmmm” I whispered silently to myself. I quickly leaped up to my feet and I ran into my long hallway. I ran down the stairs as quickly as I could with curiosity frantically swirling in my head. I grabbed a ladder and ran back upstairs. I put the ladder up and began to climb. When I was up, I saw four walls and they each had a door. I remember the wallpaper being a light red color with dark red roses along the part that was closest to the floor. The corners of the walls were peeling so it was kind of obvious this place was pretty old. There were four doors to choose from but I only had time to choose one. I knew I would come back to this place and explore the rest of what is behind the mysterious doors. I chose the one that was straight ahead because I thought it would be the most exciting one, but I yet to realize what was happening.
I quickly woke up to the loud noise of my dog jumping onto my bed. It was all a dream! It didn't seem like the craziest dream but it just seemed strange. I looked up at my ceiling just out of curiosity and to my surprise I saw a hole that looked exactly like in my dream. I was so confused and I couldn't think of what was happening. I grabbed a ladder exactly like I did in my dream. I climbed and got to the top, but there were no doors to be seen. There was no wallpaper or anything. All I could see was a beautiful red rose, and till this day I still wonder who or what left it there.
I love this story soooooooooooo much I got so in to it and couldn't stop reading!!!! Keep up the good work!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you! I'm glad you liked it!
DeleteMysterious and exiting! Keeps us on our toes, up a ladder, and into a door leading to another world. Slightly choppy, but very good description, like chopped nuts in vanilla ice-cream.
ReplyDeleteThanks! next time I will try to keep it less choppy and more original!
DeleteNice job Gia!!
ReplyDeleteVery exciting story! I liked how you were very descriptive in your work. Like Shade said, it keeps us on our toes. Maybe next time try to describe the main character a little more. Otherwise, very good work!! Keep up the good work!! :)
Very nice! I loved how it was very mysterious. Can't wait to see what you come up with next time!
ReplyDeleteGood job Gia! I couldn't take my eyes off the page! good work! You are an awesome writer but i think that you could have explained the main character a little better! But that is a really good story!
ReplyDeleteSuper good story! I loved the story, it was almost like it was copied right out of a great book. Once I started, I couldn't stop. I do think that you could have described the main character better. But besides that, it was awesome.
ReplyDeleteThe main character was me but I should have described myself more. Thank you so much!
DeleteReally strong start. I like your descriptions, I could "see" the colors and felt like I was there. As you revise, think about writing it in the present tense, like's it really happening. I totally want to see what is beyond the doors! You are an excellent writer, I'm looking forward to more.
ReplyDeleteGia that was amazing! I loved how I felt like I was there instead of just reading it off of a computer screen. My only suggestion is that you describe what the main character is like more. You did a great job and I can't wait for your next post!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! On the second part to this I will try to describe the main character more!
DeleteFantastic! I liked how you were waking up from a dream In the dream! I also liked the description of the wallpaper peeling off in your dream.
ReplyDeleteThat was really great. I loved the description of the door and the interesting ending. I'm excited to see your next post.
ReplyDelete