I hear my phone blaring out “Fireflies” by Owl City I quickly get and see that is is a call from my mother’s phone. “Hello.” I say. “Hi is this the child of Frank and Sarah Lenny?” says a deep gruff voice which I don’t recognize. “Yes, who is this?” “I’m deputy Canon, your parents have just been in an accident and are on their way to the hospital right now.” “Please tell me this is a joke.” I say as my voice cracks and tears start watering up in my eyes. “Sorry miss, I never joke,” says deputy Canon, “an officer is on their way to drive you to the hospital right now, tell her to drive you to the Rose Foundation Hospital, on Maple way, night miss.” “Okay bye.” I say as I hang up. Quickly I run to the front door, look out the window, then I sink to the floor with my head between my knees and start to break down in tears.
I stay there weeping for ten minutes when the doorbell rings. “Is this the Lenny residence?” asks a deep feminine voice as I open the door. “Yes.” “I have orders to take you to the,” “The Rose Foundation Hospital on Maple way.” I finish her sentence as I see a brunette with a healthy figure and navy blue uniform. “Alright come this way then” I grab my phone, my keys, and lock the door on the way out. I run out and hop into the almost pitch black car and put my headphones in listening to “Bad Day” by Daniel Powter. “My name is Keyna, what’s yours?” says the officer. “I like your name, mine is Ocean,” I say wincing at how wild my name sounds compared to hers. “but, I like being called O.C.” “Nice to meet you.” says Keyna “You too.” After having that small conversation there was an awkward silence in the air.
After, twenty minutes of silence, we arrive at the RFH as the locals refer to it. “Hang in there kid, it’s not as bad as it seems.” says Keyna “Thanks you too.” I say as I hop out of the car and run into the hospital. I see two police officers in the waiting room, an elder couple, and a few nurses running around. “Are you Ocean Lenny?” asked the officer with blonde hair a strong complexion and a donut and coffee in his hands. “Yes, are you deputy Canon?” “I am, come with me.” he says as he stands, brushes the donut crumbs off his uniform, and walks over to the nurse’s desk. I have no choice but to follow him. “Excuse me, Nurse Kay?” he says “I would like the room number for Frank and Sarah Lenny, this is their daughter.” he says gesturing towards me. A dark haired woman walks into the room and checks her clipboard. “They’re in room 235 on the third floor, I will take the girl to them,” she looks me in the eye. “come on this way, miss.” she says with a voice like honey, as she starts walking towards the elevator.
As I follow her, I hear a song I and not heard in the longest while run through my head “It Only Hurts When I’m Breathing.” by Shania Twain. As we ride up the elevator to the third floor I feel butterflies in my stomach. I am about to see my parents in a hospital bed with a small possibility of living. “Hun, you look like a ghost do you need to sit down before we see your parents?” says Kay. “I’ll be fine.” every word a lie. When we at last reach the third floor, we walk down the hall for what seems like forever, but is only thirty feet we reach the room concealing my parents from me. “The machines may look scary, but that is what is keeping them in a stable condition.” says Kay as she opens the door and walks in.
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ReplyDeleteGreat Story Shayne! I liked all your descriptive words and how you organized everything! keep up the good work!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Annie.
DeleteWhen I started reading, I felt like I was actually reading a book! This is a great story! You should start on a book about this. I would love to read it and I can't wait for the rest! Keep up the great work!
ReplyDeleteThank you. I am planning on continuing it. I should have a new part up next month.
DeleteGreat story. I genuinely felt sad for you. You are so talented
ReplyDeleteThanks you are talented too!
DeleteYour story is great, the story made me feel sad for the main character, keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThanks!
DeleteOh Shayne--this is awesome:) I want to see more of this too. Excellent hook and appeal to the reader. You clearly have a complex plot with really strong characters. As far as writing advice-every time you have new dialogue, break it up into a new sentence, like a book. Also, check in a book to see punctuation with dialogue. Come talk to me if you need help. Strong, strong writing and I'll look forward to see more!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I will work on that.
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