Thursday, April 30, 2015

April Post - Braden Christensen

I read "Cotton Candy" by Edward Hirsch. I really liked how descriptive he was when he was reading. It really put a bold picture in my mind making it feel like I was there for myself. There were lots of cool things about the poem. I liked the repetition when he said it was the last time he was on the bridge with cotton candy and because of those two things it made it that much more memorable.

School

When I come to school
I do lots of strange fun things
in language arts I write a lot
in choir I always sing

When I come to school 
I do many funky things
in science break things just for fun
in P.E we run laps not for fun

When I come to school
I do some boring things
like sitting at a computer for an hour
or in math we write numbers down for more than an hour

When I leave the school
I do not get on the bus
on the road that I walk
takes me right home




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4 comments:

  1. AnonymousApril 30, 2015 at 2:26 PM

    Good job Braden! The only thing that I would fix is to describe school more:)

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  2. AnonymousApril 30, 2015 at 3:25 PM

    Nice job Braden your an excellent writer. I really liked your poem about School. I thought that it was funny how you described math class that we sit and write numbers down for more than an hour. The only thing that I would change in your poem is that I would give more detail about each class. Otherwise it is awesome!

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  3. AnonymousMay 3, 2015 at 9:26 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. AnonymousMay 3, 2015 at 9:27 PM

    Good writing Braden, I can relate with how boring life can be as a student.

    These two lines sounded a little funky in my head when I read them. I recommend editing them to be some thing like:
    "in science, (I or We) break things just for fun
    in P.E we run laps, not for fun"

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